Thankful for Second Chances!

Jenny & Henry (2003)

As I tucked my young son Henry into bed a few nights ago, I told him that I loved him deeply and unconditionally…and asked him the same questions I always ask, “how was your day?,” “is there anything you need to talk about?” I know that he had been plagued with the stress of school work and tests for a few days, but he said to me, “It hasn’t been a great week mom, but like you always say, tomorrow brings the chance of a better day.” My proud mother light bulb immediately, albeit discretely, went off as I affirmed that he was so right, and I was so happy that he had that kind of perspective on life.  

 

So, I decided to use this experience to really contemplate what it is that makes me truly thankful on this day of thoughtful reflection. I decided to stray ever so slightly from the obvious, my children, family, health, happiness and, instead, go with what resonates so fiercely at this moment in my life.

Jenny & Henry (2007)

This 2014 Thanksgiving, I am thankful for second chances. Third and fourth ones, too. I am thankful to have that second chance to:

#1: Learn from a bad parenting moment and show my children that resilience means forgiveness, remorse, and hope.

#2: Do better, work harder, and show my colleagues that they made the right choice to put their trust in my ability.

#3: Be there for my friends when they need me. I am grateful for all the chances to matter in their lives. 

#4: Make the perfect brisket for Shabbos dinner.

#5: Be a patient and understanding sister that stops to just listen.

Jenny & Henry (2014)

#6: Find my loveable, yet mischievous little beagle the second time he got out of the yard.

There is something very special about second chances, you remember them. You savor them. You count yourself lucky. I will never forget my most cherished second chance. It happened 18 months after losing my beloved first baby, almost 12 years ago, when I saw my perfectly beautiful, loving, thoughtful son Henry come into the world. He was my proof that second chances can happen, will happen, and do happen if you believe in what is possible for yourself and your life. I am blessed…and so grateful for all the many chances that I have been afforded. May all my friends and family be blessed with the same good fortune. Happy Thanksgiving.

Best 2nd, 3rd, and 4th chances (2006)

(2014)

 

Happy 9th Birthday, Stanley!!!

My little Stanny Mackananny is turning 9-years-old TODAY! When I think about my little Man, I feel a sense of gratitude for having bear witness to such an incredible life. His smile is like a light in the dark that guides my way, his laughter is like wildfire that permeates the room, and his wit is like the sweetest kiss. Stanley is the easiest child on the face of the planet. He is calm and gentle when necessary, and full of energy and spirit when circumstances demand it of him. He is loved by many and understood by very few. His quiet demeanor would suggest that he is somewhat shy, but really he is an observer who waits patiently to participate in life. And though he is wise, he is humble…a trait he inherited from his father.

Stanley chills with Copper and Ollie.

 

He seems to like living in the benevolent shadow of his brother and sister but knows how to be heard when he needs to be. Audrey and Henry are truly his best friends and he spends most of his Kodak moments with them. I often catch Stanley in a tender embrace with Audrey or just snuggling on the couch with Henry. They go through life creating memories that hopefully will see them through life together.

As I watch Stanley grow into the mensch he was meant to be, I see a man of strong resolve, yet the sensitivity to be kind when kindness is desperately needed. I see this particularly with his close family and friends. He is a listening leader who is prepared to give 100% of himself to make others feel comfortable.

Besides his family, his love of his two dogs, Copper and Ollie and playing soccer are most important in his life. He is content with very little and often shows me how appreciative he is for the things in his life. I believe my Stanley is meant for great things. You are my shining star baby, don’t forget mama is always behind you cheering you all the way! I love you, Manny!

The Perfect 10!

My girl is 10 years old today! I am in awe of the little woman that she is becoming. She is smart, and strong, and beautiful and my inspiration. She looks at life with compassion and purpose. Audrey has always been very strong minded but she stares down life’s challenges with patience and intelligence. I can always count on her to make good decisions with an open heart.

 

Audrey was the best baby on the planet. Always went to sleep and took her naps on schedule. Never cried. Never sick. Always happy. So good that we even decided to have her brother, Stanley because she made life so easy. Even with her severe peanut allergy, Audrey was an easy child.

Now, makeup, singing, animals, and her girlfriends rule Audrey’s existence. She loves to wear makeup and dress up at home, but she also never turns down a rock wall that she can scale with ease. She is her brothers’ sister, just a little Audrey sandwich stuck right in the middle of gentle, Henry and steal-your-heart, Stanley. She has made her indelible mark on this family. Her role has been the stabilizer, sometimes the whirlwind, sometimes the voice of reason, but always the one who watches over all of us like a little mommy.

Audrey is growing up so fast that I can hardly believe she will be a woman soon. I love what I am witnessing. I am so very proud to be the mommy of the bravest, kindest, sweetest baby girl a mama could dream of. Happy Birthday my love. 

Magical Trip

Just before the ping of the in-flight seatbelt light, I got an unexpected message from my kids’ iPad. It said, "Thank you for all of this!!! I love you. Love, Stanley." My precious 8-years-old, with never a glimmer of altruism in his long list of defining character traits, was thanking me in advance for just the promise of fun that would unfold during our first trip to Orlando, Florida. It was a simple gesture but weighted with the genuineness of his heart which resonated within mine as I embarked for the first time alone on an unknown adventure with my three children.

I am not going to lie. I saved all year to take my children to Universal Studios and with some trepidation, I looked forward to rewarding them for all their hard work, patience, and growth over the last year. Could I do it on my own? Would my own stress get the best of me? I worried that it might. But I wanted to take this time with my children now, while they were young enough to enjoy it and old enough to appreciate it.

At 6am on Monday morning, we made our way with carry-on roller suitcases in each one of our hands to drop our car at the Fast Park. Henry (11), Audrey (9), and Stanley (8) were too excited to sleep the night before and giddy with excitement. We arrived an hour before our 8am departure, passed easily through the security checkpoint and waited at the gate. In a flash, we were seated on the plane, Stanley nestled in right beside me, with Aud and Hen next to each other seated just a row ahead of us. And in what seemed like a blink, we were descending and heading towards the Loews Pacific Hotel on the Universal property. 

The first bolt of excitement came with the room keys which worked in the hotel and both of the parks we were visiting (Universal Studios and Island of Adventure). I put $50 on each key which gave them the freedom and responsibility to pay their own way during our four-day stay. If they wanted a churro or dip-n-dots or even a small souvenir, then they could buy it without question or permission, but not without consequence. They knew if they used up all their money on the first day, the subsequent days would be devoid of sweet pleasures. And as much as I would love to shower my children with all that they desire, sadly I don’t have a money tree growing in my backyard. The children were excited for the challenge and used their newfound responsibility with great care and wisdom throughout the trip.

The first day was spent exploring the beautiful hotel and swimming at the goliath pool with a volleyball net, poolside food service, a water gun station, and activities and music happening all around us. Henry and I got second place in the water balloon toss, Stanley and I played keep-it-up for hours in the pool, and Audrey won the hula hoop competition against some pretty stiff competition. I was practically moved to tears watching the confidence and fearlessness of Audrey as she battled it out. I was so proud of my girl.

Over the next few days we took in all that Universal Studios, Island of Adventure, Citywalk, and Sea World had to offer. We Express Passed our way to the head of almost every line and saw every dolphin, whale, and pet show on the menu. The Popeye ride at Island of Adventure was our favorite with The Mummy at Universal Studios coming in a close second. My kids had boundless energy and I tagged along for the ride. It was good to see them so happy and carefree. There were so many hilarious moments like when we were watching a trapeze artist flying over the dolphin show and Stanley turned to me and said, “Hey mom, that woman is like 85 years old.” And he was pretty perceptive because she was definitely older, yet still elegantly gliding through the air. Audrey’s response to his unabbreviated observation was, “Well, I hope I can do that when I am 80.”

On the last day, we strolled and danced our way down the walkway from the Island of Adventure to the hotel. I told my children how proud of was of them and how deserving they were of this adventure. I told them that I loved them and that I do my best to be the best mommy for them because that is what they deserve. Stanley’s reply, “You are perfect mommy.” We all picked a flower off the path and threw it in the river along the pathway with a parting wish. Henry wished for a happy summer, Stanley wished for a safe trip home, and Audrey refused to tell her wish. I, too, tried to keep my wish a secret, but my children know me too well and guessed it before I had time to deny telling them. “We know what you wish for mom. It’s always the same. Health and happiness for your family.”