The "X" Factor

As many people know, I am going through a very amicable divorce after 13 years of marriage. And the one thing that I am acutely aware of is the mental well-being of my children. Most days my children seem very resilient and unaffected by the separation. Our family therapist says that is normal because my children are so young and as long as their egocentric needs are met, they should be fine. For a 7, 8 and 9 year old, they just want to know they are loved and ...  can they have another piece of candy or an extra hour of TV?

But every once in awhile, my children will experience a bump in the road, so we try to encourage them to share their feelings so they can vent and release the tension going on in their little lives. We assure them at every turn that we love them and are still both here for them though we live in different homes.

Henry recently confided in me that the memories of togetherness as a family were making him sad. I assured him that we would make new memories in this new family dynamic that would make him equally as happy if not more so. And last night proved to be a great example.

My three children and I were watching the “X Factor” on TV last night. We laughed and talked all the way through the show. At one point Simon Cowell, one of the most notable judges, raised his hand to one of the performers and said, “Stop…sing a different song.” We all got a huge kick out of his abruptness and when I put my two boys down to bed they began to mimic the exchange.

Henry, 9 and Stanley, 7 share a bedroom and as I tucked them at 9 p.m., Henry began to sing a pop tune, so innocently, so sweetly. The sound of his voice singing before bed reminded me of how carefree and innocent my children remain. As I sat there enjoying Henry’s voice, Stanley raised his hand and said abruptly, “Stop…sing another song.” I laughed and Henry gladly began to sing another song. This went on for about a half an hour. Stanley, Henry and I were all singing together in the end, and I feared we would wake up poor Audrey, who was missing out on all the fun.

As I left them last night to slumber, I felt certain that this would be a new, good memory that my sons would and could cherish going forward with our lives. It gave me great peace and happiness knowing that those kinds of moments inevitably present themselves when you least expect it.

Nature hikes in fall

My children and I often go on nature hikes throughout the year. It is a great way to see my children appreciating all of nature’s gifts from birds to bugs to beautiful vistas. Last Sunday, we visited one of our favorites, Irvine Nature Center in Owings Mills. We even took our 12-week-old puppy, Copper, along with us for the first time.

Irvine Nature Center 10/2012

It was a perfect weather day and my children ran down the trail with great excitement. We stopped at every log to see if we could find some colorful salamanders hiding for cover from my anxious 7, 8 and 9 year olds. In all, I think we rounded about about 17 little lizards and when we carefully placed them back under a new log at the end of the trail, my children had given each a name. Of course, it was a bit of a challenge to keep Copper from eating them. (This puppy eats ANYTHING!)
At the end of our short hike, my children enjoyed playing on the Irvine Nature Center playground which is a wondrous, exploratory adventure that could have kept my children occupied for hours. It is a brilliantly planned landscape with what seems to be all-naturally created climbing fun for the kids. There was a tree that seemed ideally placed for the playground, and a rock climbing wall made of sticks and mud. There were play areas for children of all ages, one more fascinating than the other.
I highly recommend a day of fun at Nature Center if you can get out there before winter really sets in. Happy trails!

17 salamanders

Building block station - Irvine Nature Center playground

Climbing wall - Irvine Nature Center playground

A new puppy!

The Dansicker family has a new addition. Born July 15, 2012, our 8-week-old puppy, Copper, is a gentle, little Lemon Beagle with quite a howl.

Copper, a little boy Lemon Beagle, 8 weeks old

My children and I have wanted a dog for some time, but up until now, I have never been able to entertain the idea because my husband was allergic. Well, circumstances have opened up new possibilities and Sunday, we purchased our new family member.
It wasn’t a spontaneous decision by any means. We have been talking about it for years, and in the last four months, we have visited shelters and puppy shops around the state. Sunday, we decided to pop into Just Puppies in Towson, and we walked out with Copper.

Audrey, Henry, Copper and Stanley

My children have never seemed happier in their lives.
On Monday morning, instead of struggling to get out of bed and watching cartoons before school, I let Copper wake the children with a slobbery kiss, one by one. Henry, Audrey and Stanley sprung out of bed and put their school uniforms on in a frenzy so they could walk their new puppy. I realize the novelty will diminish in the weeks ahead, but it was a moment that gave me great pleasure.
Now, I am somewhat dreading the task of potty-training the dog. With the help of a few books, tips from the shop and my fleeting knowledge from my childhood pets, I hope it doesn’t take too long. If you have or have had a puppy before, I would appreciate any and all advice.